21 is zooming closer at a crazy speed. It feels like it's been such a long time coming and now it's right in front of my face. It only seems fair that 2 days out (since my birthday is on Sunday, I don't know if I'll have the chance to blog again before it!) that I look back on some of what 20 taught me.
I used to post on this once in awhile in a little mini series you can find those posts here and here.
In my 20th year I learned....
20 has been a good year to me, but it's been a stressful year, too. Second semester of my junior year I faced some of the most frustrating, emotionally stressing things I've dealt with in a really long time. I learned a lot about myself emotionally, and a lot about what I need in my life. The answer was: not much. Good friends, a love that endures, and family. These are the very core of what I need and truly, with a roof over my head, some things to eat, and a few clothes, these are the things with which I could be happy. Happy. I learned a lot about what happy means in my 20th year.
I learned that this boy, as I've known for almost 6 years, makes me happier than anyone else ever could. I learned in my 20th year that he will support me without a double and to a fault. I learned that he has his struggles and I have mine, but we were designed for each other to be able to help one another through them. We were designed perfectly for each other and I learned that more this year than in any of the other years we've dated.
This year I learned that even though I want to, I can't take it all on. I learned that when I try anyway, I suffer. I learned that my suffering comes in an extreme form of self doubt that extends to every area of my life.
I learned so many amazing lessons in my 20th year and I'm really excited for what 21 has to bring.
In my 21st year I will...
Become a published author. We have picked out a publisher and we're working on the copy edit, the cover design concept, the title, and gathering reviews. This is HUGE for me.
Listen to my body. Learning how to eat with health in mind, but enjoy treats now and then too has been a crazy journey for me. I think I'm starting to get the hang of it though. I will focus on what my body needs in my 21st year, but you better believe I'm going to have some fun, too!
Do more for me. I've always been a people pleaser. It's part of who I am and I like it about me - to an extent. I like that it makes me a caring person. I like that it makes me more selfless than selfish. But I don't like that it means I over extend. This is my last year of college, my first year of being old enough to drink alcohol, and I intend to live it up a little. What kind of a blogger would I be if I didn't develop a taste for wine?
Continue to grow this little space. I don't express it enough, but every one of my readers holds a very special place in my heart. I feel so blessed that even ONE of you reads what I have to say. I can't believe 335 of you read it! I will continue to be ever grateful and produce awesome content for you in the 21st year of my life... you might just see a few more wine glasses and beer bottles in the process. ;)
Be bolder, be less afraid. I will take more risks. With fashion, in life, in love. I will break down walls so that others may be inspired to do the same. I will bear my soul so that others feel they can, too. I will open myself up so that others feel comfortable coming to me with their burdens, their hearts, their dreams.
Yeah, 21 is going to be the greatest year yet. And I am SO thrilled to have all of you on the ride with me! I can't wait to see what adventures 21 brings. I hope you're excited to hear all about them as they happen!
Side note: I won't be posting about my birthday until afterward, but you HAVE to come back tomorrow and check out the post on something AMAZING happening Sept. 1. I'm so excited to share it with you!